The Hermit
The Hermit is an anonymous poster that reminded me of the fact that I have a Blog.
Oh I hadn't totally forgotten, but neither was it on my mind. This person said they missed me posting. Wow. OK, I'll certainly do a post.
Being single sucks.
These three words express volumes of my personal situation. I am a grad student, I get paid to go to school, I eat pretty well...things are great. But I'm single. There are no Orthodox girls my age in this city that I know. I suppose I could go church hopping, and hit the other Orthodox churches in the area and see if anyone is there, and I suppose that ultimately that is what I will have to do. This is a somewhat distasteful idea, because I don't know anyone at any of the other churches. So this will involve being, I fear, somewhat blatant.
My continual prayer for the last few months has been for my being single to end. With a vengeance. I cannot know God's mind nor His thoughts as to what precisely is the best thing for me, but this life is getting hard to live alone. I've been single forever. It's time for it to end, or for me to be struck with the absolutely overpowering desire to be a monk.
I really do not want to be a monk.
The odd thing about this Blog is that there isn't much in the way of Orthodox arguments that are required. Everyone, or nearly everyone, that would read this post gets the idea that I cannot and will not marry a non-Orthodox. According to the church such a marriage is, in fact, definitionally impossible. Marriage is a sacrament. The sacrament of marriage cannot exist between an Orthodox and a Non-Orthodox.
Two non-orthodox of course, can marry. But we say it is not a sacramental marriage. That being said, all the lucky bastards who got married FIRST and THEN became Orthodox did not have this difficult situation.
They got hitched back when they were legitimately ignorant of the importance of marrying within your own church. Or simply by getting married before discovering Orthodoxy, they had a bigger pool of people to choose from.
I, for my part, would be grateful for one.
Bah! I'm sounding bitter. It's only because I am bitter, but I oughtn't spew that at God. It would, to say the least, not accomplish very much.
So, all of you that may read this. Pray for me. I'm tired of going it alone, and I want to get married.
Amen.
-Alexion
Oh I hadn't totally forgotten, but neither was it on my mind. This person said they missed me posting. Wow. OK, I'll certainly do a post.
Being single sucks.
These three words express volumes of my personal situation. I am a grad student, I get paid to go to school, I eat pretty well...things are great. But I'm single. There are no Orthodox girls my age in this city that I know. I suppose I could go church hopping, and hit the other Orthodox churches in the area and see if anyone is there, and I suppose that ultimately that is what I will have to do. This is a somewhat distasteful idea, because I don't know anyone at any of the other churches. So this will involve being, I fear, somewhat blatant.
My continual prayer for the last few months has been for my being single to end. With a vengeance. I cannot know God's mind nor His thoughts as to what precisely is the best thing for me, but this life is getting hard to live alone. I've been single forever. It's time for it to end, or for me to be struck with the absolutely overpowering desire to be a monk.
I really do not want to be a monk.
The odd thing about this Blog is that there isn't much in the way of Orthodox arguments that are required. Everyone, or nearly everyone, that would read this post gets the idea that I cannot and will not marry a non-Orthodox. According to the church such a marriage is, in fact, definitionally impossible. Marriage is a sacrament. The sacrament of marriage cannot exist between an Orthodox and a Non-Orthodox.
Two non-orthodox of course, can marry. But we say it is not a sacramental marriage. That being said, all the lucky bastards who got married FIRST and THEN became Orthodox did not have this difficult situation.
They got hitched back when they were legitimately ignorant of the importance of marrying within your own church. Or simply by getting married before discovering Orthodoxy, they had a bigger pool of people to choose from.
I, for my part, would be grateful for one.
Bah! I'm sounding bitter. It's only because I am bitter, but I oughtn't spew that at God. It would, to say the least, not accomplish very much.
So, all of you that may read this. Pray for me. I'm tired of going it alone, and I want to get married.
Amen.
-Alexion
posted by Alexios at 5:26 AM
5 Comments:
Dude, glad to see your post!
Come to the pan-Orthodox vespers on Sunday nights at the various parishes. Tomorrow is at St. Stephen's Serbian OC in Lackawanna.
Also, if Fr. Peter will give his blessing, come visit us at St. George Antiochian (Niagara Falls)on a Sunday....we have numerous young ladies. I'll introduce you our young adults male and female. (Male freinds are good too ....they have sisters!)
Hnag in there. I was single till I was 29. When I finally told I God I wanted his will whatever it was, my wife came out of no where (somone I knew all along).
What parish do you go to?
Just to give a little balance to FDR's perspective... sometimes you "finally tell God [that you want] his will whatever it is" and you remain single.
The only reason I bring it up is because I've heard this line one too many times in my life, "As soon as you stop looking that's when he'll show up." Besides putting me into the impossible double-bind with such a statement, it's simply absurd to be that formulaic about God.
It's quite possible that FDR was simply telling his story and was making no connotation with it, but I find that that is rarely the case. Soooo, either way, I just wanted to give balance.
I don't have words to console. I find that with this issue there are no words to console. There is only prayer.
May God bless you, Alexios!
T.
anonymous,
If you REALLY want God's will, thenm you are happy NO MATTER WHAT that turns out to be. That's my point....but the reality is that in my case and in many others I have talked to, it seems like that is all God is waiting for.....for us to quit trying to make things happen for ourselves.
I have had a bless life with my wife, 12 years and 4 kids later. But if God hadn't sent her, I was ready for whatever that meant as well.
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